The Ziva Learning Curve
by Fictionnaire
Summary: New to the team, Ziva is amused by the Team's dynamic. She's amazed by the team's interaction to Tony's coughing.


Ziva's still learning about what it's like to be a member of Gibbs' team. It might take her some time to understand a few things.

Ziva eyed Tony discreetly as she continued working. On the ride back to he'd been unearthly silent and he didn't look so well. She reveled in the silence though, even though she'd not been there long, there was obviously something wrong with the Senior Field Agent. Tony entered a coughing fit suddenly as he tried to hack up one of his lungs.

"You alright Tony?" McGee asked without looking in his direction. There was genuine concern in his voice.

"I'm fine," he answered once he stopped. Tony cleared his throat a couple of times as he attempted to rid himself of whatever was down there.

Ziva couldn't understand the concerned look in McGee's eyes and as another coughing fit ensued, the whole floor came to life with whispers. "I'm going to call Ducky," McGee reached for the phone.

"Don't you dare Probie," Tony responded quickly. McGee's threat was enough to stop the coughing in it's tracks.

Ziva watched this exchange with keen interest. "It is just a cough McGee," Ziva observed. It wasn't like he was throwing up. "Stop mothering him, Tony is a big boy," she said.

"Yeah McMother," Tony said with an attempt at a smile. "I'm a big boy. I can take," he coughed again as he almost fell off the chair doing so. McGee almost had to hold Tony down so he wouldn't fall off. Tony took his tie off and threw it aside in between spurts and swore.

"If Gibbs comes back and finds you coughing and I haven't done anything… Who do you think he's going to kill?" McGee asked.

"If you call Ducky, I'll kill you Probie," Tony warned. He didn't want anybody making any deal out of it. But knew that that was an impossibility.

Ziva couldn't understand what the big deal was, all he was doing was coughing. "Geez, you Americans are so weak," Ziva shook her head as the fruitless banter continued. It was working in Tony's favor since while they were bantering, McGee was not dialing and that suited Tony well.

"You don't understand Ziva," McGee said.

"What I understand is you are going all mother over Tony because he has a small cough," Ziva replied. "Ridiculous."

Gibbs walked to his desk with a cup of coffee and he noticed the unusual silence that greeted him. If he didn't know his team better, he swore that they were talking about him. Gibbs sat down on his chair and Tony began coughing up worse than before and couldn't stop himself. Gibbs stood straight up and began dialing. Ziva had expected more protesting at this.

"Boss I'm fine," Ziva noted a look of panic in McGee and Tony's eyes. "I swear." Again he was racked by a coughing fit and even Ziva could see Tony's eyes beginning to glaze over.

After getting off the phone, Gibbs walked up to McGee and slapped him in the back of the head. "Why didn't you call Ducky?" Gibbs asked McGee.

"I, I was," McGee couldn't find an excuse for it.

Ziva blinked as she watched Gibbs, a tough ex marine and an equally tough boss walk to Tony and pressed his hand against Tony's forehead much like a parent would do to check for a fever. "Unbelievable," she commented and looked to McGee for a quick explanation but he looked like a dog that had been smacked with a newspaper.

Ducky quick timed it into the bullpen carrying a thermometer in one hand and a stethoscope in the other. He looked like a doctor doing his rounds.

"I swear I'm fine, Its just a," Tony still continued to protest eagerly but Ducky soon put a stop with that when he thrust the thermometer into his mouth. He opened up Tony's shirt and began listening with the stethoscope.

Fortunately, Ducky managed to remove the thermometer as Tony coughed up again. This time he couldn't seem to stop as he tore at his collar to undo it. Ducky saw this and undid it for him. He frowned after Tony settled down. Ziva shook her head once again and tried not to laugh, thinking that they might call the paramedics soon.

"You're going home Anthony," Ducky said.

"I'm fine," Tony said.

"Get out of here DiNozzo," Gibbs echoed Ducky's words and they left toward the elevator with Tony protesting strongly but was virtually being dragged by the arm. McGee stood up and watched them leave.

"All that because of a cough?" Ziva asked with a stunned look on her face.

McGee approached her desk. "You must understand something Ziva. Tony got the plague a couple of months ago and since then, if Tony even sneezed, Gibbs goes into hyper mode and brings in Ducky," he explained.

"The plague?" Ziva asked dumbfounded. She had never heard of anyone getting the plague. "Is that not treatable with antibiotics?"

"It was altered, and it tore through him pretty bad," McGee said. "So if Tony looks sick, gets sick or coughs like that, we're under strict orders to call Ducky right away."

"Oh," Ziva said.

"And if Ducky is unavailable we have to call Brad Pitt," McGee added.

"Right," Ziva nodded but then suddenly stopped. "Brad Pitt? From Meet Joe Black. What will he do?" She asked McGee.

"Not _Brad Pitt… _Brad Pitt," McGee answered. "He treated Tony when he had the plague."

"He is a doctor as well as an actor?" Ziva asked with a blank look. "He is very talented."

"Not, Brad Pitt the actor, Brad Pitt the Doctor," McGee tried to explain and he rubbed his face in frustration. "Just remember that if Tony looks or acts sick, we have to call Ducky right away."

"Any other things I should know about?" Ziva asked tentatively.


End file.
